I defended my daughter's exam mark by belittling her cousin's. How do I undo that?
Family“Ella got ninety-eight. What did you get?” my aunt asked my twelve-year-old at Sunday lunch.
My daughter quietly said seventy-seven. I jumped in with, “They must set easier papers at Ella's school.” Ella was sitting beside her, still holding the certificate she had brought to show Grandma. Her face changed, and my daughter stared at her plate.
I wanted to stop the comparison. Instead I made my daughter's cousin defend an achievement she hadn't used against anyone. My aunt said she was only asking because both girls had finished exams.
My daughter later told me, “Now Ella thinks I'm jealous.” I can apologise to Ella, but I don't want to restart the discussion of which school has harder maths or tell her that I insulted her for my daughter's sake.
How do I repair this with both girls and ask the adults to stop turning their results into a family ranking?