Should I attend a family reunion if my long-term partner is excluded?
Family“Once there's a ring, of course she can come,” my uncle said when I asked why my partner wasn't on the reunion invitation.
We've been together for six years. She knows my parents, helped my aunt move and has attended the last two reunions. This year my uncle is organising a smaller lunch and says he wants “just family.” My cousin's fiancée is invited; they got engaged last month.
My partner says I can go without her, but she doesn't want me telling everyone she is working. She is free that day. That was the excuse I used when I first replied because I didn't want a row with my uncle.
I would like to see relatives who rarely visit. I also don't want our decision not to marry to become a reason she stops counting. My uncle says the engagement rule gives him a clear line when there aren't seats for everybody.
Is it better to challenge the rule, go and explain her absence honestly, or decline? I've already made the conversation harder by supplying an excuse that wasn't true.