Our daughter translates at every family dinner. How can we let her just join in?
Family“Tell your dad what Grandma said,” my brother told our ten-year-old daughter, while she was trying to finish a story about school.
My mother mostly speaks Spanish. My partner understands some, but not enough to follow a quick conversation. Our daughter is comfortable in both languages, and everyone has got used to asking her to bridge the gap. At the last dinner she translated a joke, a discussion about my brother changing jobs and three questions about our plans before her own story was forgotten.
On the way home she said, “I don't want to sit in the middle next time.” She isn't refusing to speak Spanish with Grandma. She wants to talk to her instead of passing other people's words across the table.
I speak both languages, as does my brother. We sometimes tell ourselves that asking her is good practice. When I suggested that the adults take turns, he said I was making a simple family favour into a chore. Mum worries that if we stop asking, our daughter will use less Spanish.
I want to keep their conversations going. I also don't want a visit with Grandma to feel like a shift she can't leave.
How do I change the habit at the next dinner without putting my daughter in charge of explaining why it needs to change?