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How do I stop being on call for every small change to Mum's phone?

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Mum sent three screenshots while I was at work: “Which one do I press?” The first was about changing the font size. By the third, she had opened a menu I did not recognise either.

I helped her set up the phone last month. Since then, even small questions arrive with “Can you just have a look?” I usually reply quickly because it feels kinder than leaving her unsure. Yesterday I left a meal with friends to talk her through something that could have waited.

She uses the phone confidently for her shop orders and chatting with family. This is not a case of her being unable to use it. She would simply rather ask me than search through help pages, and I have made that option very easy.

I want to offer a regular time for ordinary questions and ask her to state what is actually urgent. I am worried she will hear that as me withdrawing a favour after encouraging her to get the phone.

How would you change this arrangement kindly? I still want to help. I also want a font-size question to stay a font-size question when I am eating dinner.

Discussion

3 community replies

Describe the dinner interruption and the routine you can offer, rather than presenting a general complaint about how often she asks. “I can look at ordinary settings questions on Sunday” gives her something useful to expect without promising instant support.

You have made quick replies part of the arrangement. Changing it may take a few reminders from you, not just one announcement from her. Answering the next non-urgent screenshot immediately would make the new limit harder for both people to understand.

Ask her to include the goal with the screenshot. “I want the text bigger” is easier to discuss later than “which button?” inside a menu neither person meant to open. She can often stop changing things until you have time to look together.

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