How do I rebuild trust after promising not to get angry about a bad grade?
Parenting"You said I could tell you anything. Then you took my Saturday." My thirteen-year-old slid the test paper under his dinner plate.
He had told me he'd done badly before the results came out. I said I wanted honesty and wouldn't get angry. When I saw the mark, I canceled his plan to go to the cinema with a friend. I knew he'd spent time gaming the night before the test and decided the two things were connected. I hadn't asked how he'd prepared earlier in the week.
He now says he'll let the school portal tell me next time. My partner thinks we should restore the cinema plan because I broke the promise. I worry that restoring it means we're accepting preparation that wasn't enough.
The teacher has offered to explain which parts of the test he struggled with. That seems more useful than another argument over the number, but we haven't spoken yet. How can I keep expectations about schoolwork while correcting the message that telling me first brought a faster punishment?