Real people. Real opinions.
Browse WAURE
← Advice & Questions
Health · Advice & Questions ·

My partner announced my quit-smoking date to the family. How do I take it back?

Health category photographHealth

At Sunday lunch my partner said, "Two weeks from Monday, no more cigarettes." My aunt applauded. I had not chosen a date.

I had told him I was talking to a pharmacist about a quit plan. He took that as permission to make it public because he thought a crowd would keep me motivated. I spent lunch nodding, then bought cigarettes on the way home and felt as though I had already failed something that had not started.

He is tired of smoke coming in through the back door, which is a fair household complaint. I am tired of conversations about it becoming a performance for relatives.

[CDC provides resources for making a quit plan and getting support](https://www.cdc.gov/tobacco/campaign/tips/quit-smoking/index.html). I want to use support, but I need to agree what it looks like.

How do I correct the family announcement without turning it into a promise that I will never set a date?

Discussion

2 community replies

A correction can be small: "That date was announced before I had agreed my plan. I'm working on it, and I'll tell you if there's something I want help with." It does not need a family debate about whether you are serious.

Your partner has two concerns bundled together: household smoke and your attempt to quit. You can agree how to keep smoke away from the home while telling him that dates and announcements need your agreement. An unwanted audience does not settle either concern.

Join the discussion

More in Health