I've let my brother think I visit our grandmother every Saturday
Confessions'I won't arrange Saturday; that's your day with Gran,' my brother said. I visit her about once a month.
I used to go most Saturdays when I lived around the corner. After moving, I kept describing it as my Saturday visit. Nobody asked for a count. Whenever Mum mentioned how reliable I was, I accepted it, and I didn't correct my brother when he praised me for keeping the old routine.
Gran is busy with her own friends and hasn't asked for weekly visits. This isn't an urgent care arrangement. But my brother has been planning his occasional visits around a schedule that doesn't exist, and I don't know whether he's been avoiding weekends she would have enjoyed seeing him.
How do I correct this without making the conversation sound like I'm requesting a family attendance chart? I want to be accurate about what I do, while keeping visits from becoming a competition.