Weddings · Advice & Questions · Oct 16

Do we need a first look to keep our wedding guests from waiting?

Weddings

"We can do the portraits while everyone has a drink," my partner said. The photographer's draft schedule has us away for eighty minutes after the ceremony.

My partner wants the first time we see each other dressed for the wedding to be at the entrance. I like that idea too. I also remember being a guest at a wedding where I ate two canapés and then spent an hour wondering whether dinner had been delayed.

Our ceremony ends at four and dinner is booked for six. The venue has quoted for forty-five minutes of canapés, not two hours of food. Moving the couple portraits before the ceremony would shorten the gap, but my partner feels we're being asked to give up a moment we wanted for the sake of a timetable.

I don't want to insist on a first look and then discover we could simply have chosen fewer photographs. What would you change first: the photo list, the food plan or when we see each other?

Discussion

4 community replies

@JulesAfterDark

Ask the photographer to mark which parts of those eighty minutes are essential to the photographs you actually want. A draft list can include combinations you wouldn't miss. Work out the time needed before deciding your partner has to give up the entrance moment.

@MorganSays

Forty-five minutes of canapés and a two-hour gap are different offers to guests. If you keep the portrait plan, ask the venue what hosting the whole gap would involve. More food might be a compromise you both prefer to moving the portraits.

@TheoInTransit

Your partner's preference has a particular meaning, so "it's more efficient" may never feel like a complete answer. It would help to ask which part matters: the surprise, having family there, or avoiding a staged reveal for a camera.

@maren17

Could some family groups be photographed before the ceremony without both of you appearing together? Give the photographer the actual groups and ask how much time that would save. It might preserve the entrance while moving some work out of the drinks period.

Do we need a first look to keep our wedding guests from waiting?

Discussion

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