My sister still invites my ex to small family dinners. Can I ask for some separate invitations?
Family“He's my friend too. I can't just erase six years,” my sister said when I asked who was coming to her birthday dinner.
My former partner will be there. He and my sister were friends before we dated, and that friendship continued after we split four months ago. We ended the relationship because we wanted different futures. I don't want her to stop seeing him.
What I find hard is that every small family dinner since the split has included him. I either spend the evening making careful conversation or stay home while he sees my nieces. My sister says if we're on good terms, it shouldn't matter.
This is her birthday, and she should have people she cares about around her. I don't want to hand her a list of dates when he is permitted to attend. I do want some ordinary evenings with my family where I don't have to practise being fine with the change.
How can I ask for that without turning her friendship into a loyalty test?