Is a monthly gift to my adult son a reason to ask for his spending history?

My son asked whether I'd keep sending the $100 I used to give him during college. He's 22, has started an apprenticeship and still lives at home. I also pay his $45 phone bill.

I said I'd consider continuing for three months, then immediately added, "But I'd want to see what you're spending it on." He went quiet and asked whether I wanted his bank statements.

I was thinking of lunches, fares and the occasional night out, not a full inspection. Still, I hadn't said the money was for any particular expense before asking. I can afford to give it. I'm less comfortable with the idea that he'll plan his budget around support that just continues by habit.

My partner says we should either make a gift or set clear conditions, rather than calling it a gift and then checking the receipts. That sounds fair, but I don't know what a reasonable limit looks like when we also provide his home and food.

Would you offer a fixed three-month gift, help with one named bill, or stop the extra $100? I'd like to support his start without making every purchase a family discussion.