Food · Advice & Questions · Oct 19

I took the last two roast potatoes before my sister had any. How do we handle seconds from a shared platter?

Food

I reached for the two potatoes left in the serving dish. My sister looked up and said, "I haven't had one yet." I put one back, which felt ridiculous once it had visited my plate.

I'd assumed everyone had already helped themselves. She'd been cutting food for her child while the platter moved around, and I hadn't noticed. Our dad said she should have asked sooner; she said she shouldn't have to reserve a potato while helping somebody else eat.

I apologised, but at the next family dinner I found myself watching everyone else's serving spoons instead of enjoying my meal. Is there an easy way to make sure people get a first helping before seconds, without appointing somebody to monitor the dish? I can see my mistake. I'd like the next meal to be less tense than the last two potatoes made this one.

Discussion

3 community replies

@maren17

The apology can be simple: you assumed she'd had a serving and didn't check. She was occupied helping her child, so the assumption cost her something. You don't need to defend it by arguing that she could have spoken sooner.

@northstar88

Your dad's solution would make the person already doing another task responsible for tracking the platter too. A first pass that reaches each person before seconds is a more useful family habit than expecting somebody to call out reservations across dinner.

@softfocus

Two potatoes managed to create a queue without anybody seeing one. Before taking the last portion, a quick 'Has everyone had some?' would have exposed the missing first serving. It doesn't require counting what's on each plate.

I took the last two roast potatoes before my sister had any. How do we handle seconds from a shared platter?

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