AITA · Advice & Questions · Oct 18

AITA for telling my friend to join the back of the queue when she arrived with three extra people?

AITA

I waved my friend Hana over when she arrived, then stopped waving when three people followed her.

We'd agreed to meet at a weekend plant sale. She was running late and asked me to save her a place. I was about twelve people from the entrance when she arrived with her flatmate and two friends I hadn't met.

I said, "I was saving space for you, not four people." Hana said they were shopping together and would only take a minute. The person behind me asked whether they were all joining.

I told Hana's group to start at the back, and I stayed where I was. She said I could have gone back with them instead of sending them away like strangers. They queued for another twenty-five minutes. I bought the small fern I'd come for and waited outside.

Hana didn't buy anything. She says by the time they entered, the things they wanted had gone. I don't know whether those plants had already sold before any of us arrived.

I would have been comfortable with Hana joining me because we'd arranged it. I wasn't comfortable adding three unexpected people ahead of everyone else. But I let her take my refusal alone while I kept the place I'd saved. AITA for staying in the queue?

Discussion

3 community replies

@MorganSays

Saving a place for one friend and adding a group of four aren't the same favor. The people already behind you had a reasonable interest in how much longer the queue became. Hana needed to ask about the extra people before arriving.

@TheoInTransit

You could have moved to the back with her, but that would have been another choice, not the only polite solution. You'd already waited for the plant you wanted. Her bringing a group changed the meeting arrangement as well as the queue.

@maren17

Be careful with the claim that your refusal cost them the plants. You don't know when those sold. It's possible the delay mattered; it isn't established. The argument can stay with the queue without turning an unknown stock history into your responsibility.

AITA for telling my friend to join the back of the queue when she arrived with three extra people?

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