Our friend is officiating and keeps adding jokes after we remove them

Our officiant keeps putting jokes back into the ceremony script.

We keep taking them out.

He is my fiancé's former roommate and one of the funniest people we know. That is partly why we asked him. He can make a room feel relaxed without turning every moment into a performance.

Apparently we should have been more specific about the second half of that sentence.

His first draft opened with a joke about how long it took my fiancé to propose. It included a story about me labeling food in our refrigerator and a line asking guests to place bets on who would cry first.

None of it was cruel. Some of it was genuinely funny. Together, it made the ceremony sound like a toast delivered before dinner.

We thanked him, said we wanted a warmer and quieter tone, and returned the document with cuts. He agreed immediately.

The next version contained three new jokes.

When we asked why, he said the ceremony needed “breathing room.” He worries that without laughter the guests will feel as though they are listening to a formal reading. We told him silence and sincerity are not emergencies.

He heard us. I am not sure he believes us.

My fiancé thinks his friend is nervous. Humor is how he handles attention, and officiating feels more exposed than giving a speech. If we remove every comic line, we may be removing the tool that lets him speak naturally.

I do not want a robotic ceremony. I also do not want to wonder which private habit will become the room's next release valve.

We proposed one agreed opening joke and no improvising about us. He accepted that rule, then asked whether reactions during the vows counted as improvising.

That question did not increase my confidence.

We could replace him. There is enough time to hire a professional, and our friend could attend without carrying a role that may not suit him. My fiancé worries that doing so would turn a difference in style into a rejection of the friendship.

We could also give him a complete script and ask him to read it exactly. That protects the ceremony but reduces the reason we chose someone who knows us.

The middle option is a final rehearsal with the full script, one approved humorous moment and an explicit instruction that the vows are not interactive material.

I think that can work if he treats the boundary as part of the role rather than feedback he is expected to improve creatively.

Would you keep the friend with a locked script, hire a professional or trust one final revision? How many times should a couple restate the tone before an officiant's repeated additions become evidence that he is not the right person for the ceremony?