My neighbor attached holiday garland to my porch column while decorating our rowhouses. How do I undo the assumption?
NeighboursI came home to find a red garland looped from my neighbor’s porch to mine.
Our rowhouses have separate front steps but connected rooflines. The neighbor decorates enthusiastically every December. This year she wrapped her railing, framed her door with lights and continued the garland across the narrow gap between our homes. One end is fastened around my porch column with green wire.
It looks cheerful. It also appeared without a conversation.
I do not dislike holiday decorations, and I am not trying to preserve a perfectly bare facade. My concern is the easy expansion from her house to mine. The garland crosses above my steps, and its lights plug into an outlet on her porch. If I leave it, our entrance becomes part of a display she controls. If I remove it without speaking, I risk turning a small decorative choice into a statement of rejection.
When I texted, “I saw the garland attached to our column,” she responded with a row of heart emojis and said she wanted the houses to look coordinated. That confirmed the intention but not the permission.
My partner thinks we should let it stay until January because the attachment is temporary and harmless. I worry that tolerating it will make next year’s larger plan feel preapproved. The neighbor has already mentioned adding matching wreaths to “both doors.”
I would be open to coordination if asked. We might agree on lights along the shared roofline or choose separate decorations with a common color. What I do not want is to negotiate after installation, when removal can be framed as spoiling something everyone else enjoys.
The simplest response is probably: “It is pretty, but please ask before attaching anything to our house. We are going to remove this end from our column. Next year we can plan together if we both want to.” That is honest and may sound overly formal for garland.
Would you remove it now, allow it for this season while setting a rule for the future, or propose a different attachment that stays entirely on her side? How much weight should temporary beauty carry when the real issue is consent?