My friend recommends difficult movies and quizzes me afterward

A friend of mine loves recommending movies that are strange, slow or structurally complicated. I usually appreciate the suggestions. He has introduced me to filmmakers I would never have tried on my own, and our best conversations can make a confusing film more interesting.

The problem is the conversation has started to feel like an exam. As soon as the credits end, he asks what I think a recurring object symbolized, whether I noticed a sound from the opening scene and why the director withheld a certain piece of information. If I answer differently, he does not ask how I arrived there. He explains what I missed.

Last week he sent me a three-hour film with a message saying, “This one rewards attention.” I watched it after work and liked several parts, but I was tired and lost track of one secondary character. His first response was, “Did you understand who the visitor really was?” When I said I was not sure, he laughed and told me I had watched the movie but had not really seen it.

I said recommendations were becoming stressful. He replied that challenging art asks effort from the audience and he was trying to help me engage more deeply. That may be sincere, but it also gives him the role of teacher and me the role of student without either of us agreeing to it.

I do not want him to switch to safe choices or stop sharing work he loves. I want room to dislike a movie, miss something or form an interpretation before hearing the correct answer. Difficulty can invite curiosity without becoming a test of worthiness.

For his next recommendation, I am considering saying I will watch only if we begin with reactions rather than questions. Another option is to trade picks, so neither person owns the discussion.

How would you reset this pattern without rejecting the friendship behind it? When does enthusiastic guidance become gatekeeping, even if the person believes they are helping?