My convention partner abandoned our costume after I paid for the nonrefundable parts

My friend and I planned a paired costume for a fan convention this fall. It was her idea. We chose two characters whose outfits only really make sense together, traded reference images for weeks and agreed on a budget before either of us ordered anything.

I spent $186 on fabric, boots and a custom piece I cannot return. I also used three weekends building a prop in my garage. She sent progress photos at first, then became vague whenever I asked about a fitting.

On Sunday, she admitted she no longer wants to wear the costume. She tried part of it on, felt self-conscious and decided she would have more fun in normal clothes. She still wants to attend the convention with me. She says the costume was always optional and that I can wear mine alone.

I do not want her to wear something that makes her uncomfortable. A costume is supposed to be fun, not a debt strapped to someone’s body. I also feel stranded. Mine includes an object that the second character is meant to carry, and several visual jokes disappear without the pair. More importantly, I would not have spent this amount on a solo costume.

When I asked whether she could reimburse part of the custom piece, she said she never told me to order an expensive version. That is technically true. We discussed the total budget, but we did not assign responsibility if one person quit. She spent money on her own items too, although most can be reused.

I have three options. I can wear the costume alone and try not to resent every photo request. I can sell or alter it and attend casually. Or I can look for another fan who already knows the character, which solves the visual problem but turns a friendship plan into an audition.

The convention is still weeks away, so there is time to adapt. What I cannot tell is whether asking for money would be fair accountability or punishment for changing her mind about her body. How would you divide the financial loss without treating consent to a costume as a contract that cannot be withdrawn?