Can I refuse to lend one particular book to a friend who treats books differently?

My friend pulled my grandfather's cookbook from the shelf and said, "Can I borrow this for the weekend?" I hesitated. He'd written notes in the margins, and I'd kept the little paper bookmarks he made.

She borrows other books from me. The last one came back with several folded page corners. She apologised when I mentioned it, but also said books were meant to be used. I agree about my ordinary paperbacks. This one matters to me for reasons beyond reading it.

She offered to be especially careful. I said I'd think about it because refusing felt like announcing that I didn't trust her. Now she has asked again. Should I explain the history and keep it at home, or give her a chance to show that she understands the difference? I don't want an object to become an argument about what sort of friend she is.